60 Years Without Marilyn.

Firstly, I can’t believe the day has finally come which marks sixty whole years since Marilyn tragically left this world. Her physical being may have been gone for well over half a century but her spirit and legend has not stopped growing and this shows no sign of stopping.

I decided with this Anniversary post, that I wasn’t going to focus on Marilyn’s last day and dispel all the conspiracies and myths that have slandered her name over the years. instead I wanted to do a post celebrating her life and how much she has impacted my own, specifically sharing my trip to Hollywood for her 50th Anniversary.

In August 2012, which is incredibly a decade ago – (bare with me I have to take a moment to process that one), my Mum and myself ventured all the way from England to Marilyn’s Birthplace, Los Angeles, California and stayed in Hollywood for 10 whole days. I still find this really hard to comprehend, almost a dream feeling in many ways for a very specific reason.

In 2011 I had an emotional breakdown and stopped socializing, left Sixth Form College and pretty much stopped functioning as a normal human being. It was and still is a very sad time for me to talk about and the most important support I had during that time was my Parents and Marilyn. I had found her in October 2010, five months before my world pretty much turned upside down and as Marilyn’s 50th Anniversary was coming up in August 2012, my Mum came up with the most amazing idea of us trying to go to Hollywood, to celebrate a person so very special to my heart.

Of course, in my mind this was simply a pipe dream and there was no way in hell I’d be able to leave my home and travel thousands of miles to somewhere I’d never been, meeting people I’d only talked to online. In all honesty there was no certainty that I was ever going to achieve this, we even had to take multiple trips to Manchester Airport for me to try and gain some confidence in myself that I could try and make this happen. As heartbreaking as it sounds, I was in no way living a life during that time and I think ironically enough that’s what gave me the somewhat strength to take the leap of faith, with my best friend by my side, always.

Throughout my ten days there, I visited so many important places to Marilyn and Historic Landmarks within Hollywood, it truly was a trip of a lifetime and I can only dream of one day finding the courage that little 18 year old girl in these photos had built up, through lots of therapy, medication and unconditional love.

I actually find it quite upsetting looking at the photos from my trip, as I look so unwell. The 17 months from March 2011 – August 2012 had really taken a toll on me, mentally and physically which is very apparent. After returning from Hollywood, I started napping a lot due to continuous ongoing pain and I ended up becoming very ill, having to have major surgery 8 months later, in March 2013. So I just wanted to address the elephant in the room, it is me – I promise!

Visiting Marilyn was ironically one of the most beautiful moments, despite being at a Cemetery which we so often associate with death and morbidity. Westwood Memorial is truly an absolute dream and it’s actually really comforting to see how many of Marilyn’s Co-Stars, Friends and Family are also buried there. When my Mum and I arrived there, (we visited twice, once just by ourselves and the other for Marilyn’s Memorial) it was so calming and the atmosphere just exuded happiness. When we arrived at Marilyn’s pink tinted crypt another visitor shouted to us how she still stands out in death, which warmed my heart as it’s definitely true.

I thought I’d feel so much sadness and discomfort, but instead I felt so happy, it was a truly beautiful experience. I’d taken my own card for Marilyn and written many followers names from my alwaysmarilynmonroe fan account, to let them pay their respects too. To make it even more special, we even saw a Hummingbird when we were spending time with Marilyn, as silly as it may sound I like to think she sent it.

A decade may now have passed, which again, I still find hard to believe, but I’m very lucky to say that I’m still in touch with many of the people I was fortunate enough to meet or befriend during and before my trip to Hollywood. Lorraine, Joel, Jackie, Rachel, Ashlee, Suzie, Claudia, Dawn, Monica, Scott, Mary, Gary and the many fans in Immortal Marilyn and Marilyn Remembered.

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